Smiling! Can´t stop smiling!

5.

Smiling! Can´t stop smiling! With the voice of Freddie Wadling in my materially empty apartment, he fills it...

A minimalistic apartment furnished with findings from basements, containers and so on.

Laying in my bed I built myself from thrown away stuff writing to you, it´s your lines, it´s content that´s making me smile.

It was not “The Sorrows of an American” I got but “The Enchantment of Lily Dahl”. But I saw they had “The Sorrows of an American” at the book-sale so now that you made such a nice suggestion, to read the same novel and discuss it I am going to take another trip to the sale, I also saw they had the collected poetry of Paul Auster... By Siri I have read “The Blindfold” and “What I Loved”. The later a very moving reading experience... on many levels, both read during my time as homeless, by the way.

Too bad my things were burned, which is what I believe about my books or I would have hoped they were given to someone who appreciates books. I had everything written by Coetzee, when I discover an author I like it´s not unusual for me to get all of their novels, I read everything. “Dusklands”, “Waiting for the Barbarians”, “Disgrace”, three favorites, novels that attract me more than usual. But that does not mean I don´t appreciate his other works. “Life and times of Michael K”, “The Master of Petersburg” and “Diary of a bad year”. Everything by J.M. Coetzee... is worth reading... still not quite as good as the above mentioned.

Just like you I read lots.

I also like “The road” and “No Country for Old men”, even the adaptations, and speaking of movies, the adaptation of “Disgrace” starring John Malkovich, also “Being John Malkovich” should be mentioned as a good movie.

Sure it´s the same Fowles who has written “The Collector”, a special novel, even if I appreciate it I appreciate “The Magus” more, however the two should not in any way be compared, just two novels by the same author. I would like to read “The Magus” soon again, perhaps a novel to read at the same time/discuss? A novel that was in my collection just like “Walden”. I don´t know, don´t know if she is angry, I hope she is happy, well, like me moved on.

The latest I read by Joyce Carol Oates / Rosamond Smith was “Snake Eyes” (had time to read a lot when I was homeless), I like her novels.

As you ask you will be answered, may sound like an afterthought but somehow I knew what your answer would be... living in the moment. I would have answered that too, even if there are thoughts regarding the future nothing is decided, but here and now...

Speaking of things, feeling trapped, can feel a sense of panic with too many belongings, like they are binding me, even if I know I can walk away and leave them behind the feeling is there... So a sign saying “Free stuff” is sympathetic, I would stop by if/when I see one. Even me with my view on things can be appealed by going to yard sales/auctions... mostly because of the books you can find...

More speaking of things, tomorrow I am going to my grandmothers house to “clean up”, the house is going to be sold. I want to live there, a house by a lake my grandfather built. But people/relatives become like crazy, or if they already are when they smell money and letting the black sheep of the family take over the house is not an option... in their world, and not economically in mine. I don´t have one or a few million in my mattress. Or who knows, I found it in a basement, will check...

Jokes aside, anyways it´s too bad the house is being sold, the subject of contemplation for me today.

I think both my grandmother and grandfather would appreciate the thought of the house staying in the family, it´s not that I have to own it, just live in it, take care of it... but as I said, people and their view of money make my idea utopian.

All kinds of forced joining is sick! Let´s send our passports to the elected (not by me though) and let them know our decision, from now on we/I cancel my/our citizenship in your game, the mapdrawers borders.

Of course there is a difference between use and abuse, wish I could have a smoke in the morning, one in the day and one at night... sounds kind of like medicin...

Can´t be worse than the vaccine the authorities wanted to inject people with and so did. That is abuse... tricking/hurting people.

Writing that after pressing send I am going to have a hot bath might not be so kind writing to you, now...

Sorry.

But speaking of baths, bathtubs, I want one of those in the place I am going to live in, in the forest. An outdoors-bathtub... heated by firewood... with a starry sky to gaze at... now it will be a candle.

I don´t want to be secretive towards you!

Now I am going to write to your email.

Thomas